What is asked of me?

Often I wonder what it is that I am suppose to do. Some days it is as simple as do the laundry or have dinner ready when Donna gets home but then there are the days when I am challenged by my faith. I usually react by turning to God for my answer but on some occasions He seems to say "handle it John". Now, how should I handle a situation where it seems that no matter what I say it will hurt someone and/or there seems to be no right answer? A matter comes to mind, how do you tell an otherwise strong Christian that their demeanor seems to repel those who they should be trying to attract. I have a friend who loves the Lord but reacts with flair. As my friend walks away from a meeting with people we have to do buisness with he might say, just loud enough to be heard, "now thats a stupid rule" or " how stupid is that". I agree, sometimes those things said or rules laid out seem to be "stupid" in our eyes, but they have rules to live by and stupid or not we as Christians should not be calling names or judging their motives. I believe that Proverbs 10:19 speaks to this "WHen words are many, sin is not absent, but he who holds his tongue is wise". Also Proverbs 21:23 "He who guards his mouth and his tongue keeps himself from calamity", these verses tell me that wisdom is not always saying what is on your mind even if there is truth to the thought. I think that even venturing to the tought could be sinful since it is not seeking a way to win that peerson to Christ. Ok, I am not a preacher so I won't go on but do you see my stand? Do I say something to my friend or do I show wisdom and hope he sees what I do and not say? I would love to say something but then He is not me and I have enough of my own faults but am I called to make hime aware of my concern? Hummm, what is asked of me?